Civics Secures Socialism Act

USSA Shirt on a hanger

Recently introduced in both the House and Senate, the “Civics Secures Democracy Act” (CSDA), is a bipartisan bill supposedly designed “to restore the importance placed on civics education in American classrooms with targeted federal investments to support and expand access to civics and history education,” according to the bipartisan co-signers. The bill was introduced in the Senate by Chris Coons (D-DE) and John Cornyn (R-TX) and in the House by Rosa DeLauro (D-CT), Tom Cole (R-OK), and Earl Blumenauer (D-OR).

Undisclosed sources from both Coons and DeLauro’s office acknowledged over coffee that the bill would be better named “Civics Secures Socialism Act” but laughingly stated that the correct title would not have gained Republican support. “Tell them that it is something encouraging a return to teaching civics and they will sign on without bothering to read it,” giggled one administrative assistant. The other chortled “Yeah, like any of them would even understand it if they did!”

Socialist Teachers Association spokesperson, Wendi Rangarten, stressed the importance of the bill. “Coupled with classes on Critical Race Theory, the Civics Secures Democracy Act will allow educators to properly groom the next generation of activists.” The bill emphasizes activist training for K-12 classrooms, which includes civic engagement, aka rioting. According to Ms. Rangarten, “This civics education will be part of a broader ideological education. Children will be taught how to interact with their parents as well as others who might be less well informed.” Ms. Rangarten further indicated that extra credit for attending “peaceful protests” in support of BLM or Antifa would more than likely be possible, depending on the instructor.

Image From: “USSA” (CC BY 2.0) by karpidis

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