Vote By Mail – What Could Go Wrong?

Mail-in voting is definitely safe says the USPS. Democrats demanded the use of patriotic envelopes in red, white and blue to help postal workers separate the Republican, Independent and Democratic ballots. This has improved the old antiquated sysem and now ballots can be properly expedited. The previously used R or D in the bar code on the outside of the envelope was insufficient for postal workers to group ballots easily. Independent ballots will be grouped by new color-coded sorting machines with regular mail.  Older sorting machines have been removed in order to make way for these new sorting machines. 

The President believes the system is ripe for fraud.  Democrats believe the process is equal opportunity for fraud given the color-coded envelope improvement. Democrats have a plan to maximize fraud opportunities. Democrats have the endorsement of the Postal Workers Union and are recruiting postal workers as campaign workers. They believe the Republicans have failed by not investing in the postal worker vote.  Republicans are jealous of their Democratic endorsement.

Undeliverable mail is filled out and returned to the county for the voter as a service.  Ballots are expected to have delays along party lines. The longest delays are expected for Independent ballots since they are sorted with regular mail which is usually white also.

Republicans have since invested in the disgruntled postal workers as a last line of defense. A single disgruntled worker can counteract many Democratic postal workers.

In the past, the jackbooted gestapo national guard was used to deliver mail in emergencies but Democrats are up in arms against that possibility by Dictator Trump. The DogFacePony Express says they deliver mail faster and better than USPS and are willing to have color-coded ponies if needed. Write your Congreesman to defund the USPS and replace it with the DogFacePony Express.