Hopalong With Biden

President-elect Joe Biden reportedly slipped and twisted his ankle while walking his dog and chewing gum. His doctor said a CT scan indicated that he has hairline fractures in the “mid-foot” area. He will “likely require a walking boot” for several weeks. 

Joe may have been trying to show he is a strong and virile 78 years old or he may have a pre-existing foot condition.  The secret service is enthusiastically looking forward to determining a dogwalking schedule to protect Biden from walking. They haven’t determined what to do about the dangers of chewing gum. There will be a protection detail for each dog, since the President has two. And what about Hunter, will he be on the level of the dogs. Will he have a walking detail and a protection detail? Will he be allowed to chew gum in the White House?

The mainstream media has not been looking into the possibility that Biden has Covid toes and thus Covid.  They do not follow up on Biden’s health like previous President-elects but that is probably because he is really not President-elect. A confidential source revealed a Covid test was taken and was negative but they had to cover up his foot defect which had resulted in a limp. His mishap with dogs was the cover story that was developed.

We at DogFacePonia continue to believe that Joe is a hypochondriac who continues to develop Covid symptoms or that he has Munchausen syndrome as we previously postulated.

Image From: “Biden-foot-in-mouth” (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0) by mariopradojr3000