Presidential Beard

Abraham Lincoln Picture

A razor shortage and unemployment has resulted in a new facial hair trend. Everyone who is anyone is now sporting a Covid beard.  Most have to dye their beards to hide their age though.

Before Abraham Lincoln, no previous President sported a beard. Since President Taft in 1913, no President has had any facial hair. Trump wants to appear more masculine and to be in solidarity with other corona beard growers. Since beards are often erroneously associated with testosterone levels, Trump has decided a beard is necessary to prove he is not one of those who can’t grow a beard.  He has already gained his Covid 15 pounds.

Trump will be wearing a mask until the beard is big and beautiful like the wall so he can get a jump on Biden. Trump is concerned that Biden is hiden’ and secretly growing a beard. He is concerned that Biden with a beard will look like Santa Claus and people will vote for him expecting free gifts.  Biden probably thinks he is Santa Claus looking at his campaign promises. 

There is no evidence that facial hair increases your risk for a COVID-19 infection, thus the President has the go ahead from doctors.  We can all anticipate the unveiling.

Image From: “Abraham Lincoln” (Public Domain) by Smithsonian Institution