All-Powerful Oversite to Review all Cases
Facebook has released a statement today that in cooperation with Democrat leadership they are unveiling a new plan to help the government. Facebook will for free review all legal cases around the nation as requested by Nancy Pelosi. They will make determination via the independent investigation team appointed by George Soros. Facebook also thanked George Soros for all his money and help with the program so they could get it active as soon as possible to benefit Democrats across the nation.
The first two cases that have been reviewed are the cases of Kyle Rittenhouse vs Peaceful Protesters, Jacob Blake vs. Police.
In the Case of Kyle Rittenhouse Vs. Peaceful Protesters the honorable court of Facebook finds as follows,
Kyle Rittenhouse should not be praised for defending himself. BLM and Antifa have the right of way in cases of this nature. We can not in good conscience allow for anything positive to be said about him on Facebook as it is clear he killed two peaceful protesters. These protesters were only trying to teach Rittenhouse how to protest correctly. The skateboard that crashed into Rittenhouse was merely the proper way to treat a Lying Dog Face Pony Soldier. The attempts to take his gun were just lesson two when they would have only murdered a Lying Dog Face Pony Soldier in cold blood. The Protesters were prevented from teaching Rittenhouse a life ending lesson.
Ruling: In favor of the two Peaceful protestors.
Sentence: All positives news regarding Kyle Rittenhouse shall be stricken from Facebook until such time as he is found guilty in a real court of law which we all know will totally (Never) happen.
In the Case of Jacob Blake vs. Police the honorable court of Facebook finds as follows,
Jacob Blake honorable father, wrongfully accused domestic offender, knief wielding rapist shot in the back three times for ignoring police commands. We can not let justice be served in this case and must intervene as much as possible to make sure the police are held accountable for their actions. We have heard and seen to evidence to show that Blake was anything but good father checking on his kids in the car and bam. Shot 7 times for no reason, by no means does the evidence show anything else.
Ruling: In Favor of Jacob Blake
Sentence: All positive news shall be promoted heavily on Facebook from now on. Negative comments or stories shall be removed. Blake has not had his day in court to prove that he is innocent of domestic violence and rape. The Police are guilty and even if they are proven innocent we cannot allow such justice to effect the peaceful protesting that is reshaping a community.
DogFacePonia News is confused by rulings like this, but it is Facebook court and they know everything that is right and wrong. DUH!