In a turn of events the Chinese have found a way to turn back time!
In a press release early this morning, DogFacePony Soldiers on the Ground in China relate the events as they took place. “It’s a Rave, a freakin’ Rave… right here at the Wuhan Water Park!”, stated DogFacePony Soldier Hector.
“The masks are gone, people are touching, it is almost like we are in August of 2019!”, said LyingDogFacePony Soldier Melinda.
“It’s just as if we’ve entered a Time Warp! I had to bring my knees in and jump to the side to avoid being crushed!!”, yelled DogFacePony Soldier Katelyn.
The on hand news reports can only suggest the Chinese have created a local Time distortion, reversing effects back to before bats and old ladies were the topic of conversation. Either that, or things might not be that bad after all.
However, our LDFP-Foreign Correspondent Huang Li asked us to listen to the State Chinese Media… That everyone in the West was just experiencing a flash back and it’ll soon pass if they take the Microsoft Anti-Virus.
For our part, we here at DogFacePonia, thought the Magnificent Mile in Chi-town was a Rave sponsored by the Mayor until we found that there was no DJ or glow sticks.
It was a major disappointment.