Pride Group Suggests Traveling to Portland or Detroit Instead of Florida

Desantis with arms open wide

The NAAPC (National Association for the Advancement of Political Correctness) has come out with a travel advisory for black and LGBTQIW+ people for Florida. The organization says Governor De Santis has attempted to outlaw publications about race and LGBTQIW+ identities. His actions have made Florida unsafe for those groups. The NAALGBTQIW+ (the National Association for the Advancement of practically everyone but Straight White Males) organization has also issued a travel alert.  Target is no longer selling women’s bathing suits with Bud Light holders in Florida. Your baby, however, can still get rainbow onesies that say Pride at Kohls. That was the last straw. Leading to advisory and alternate options for pride month and other summer travel.

Where to go instead?

A travel agency has been created to assist travelers with alternate travel arrangements. Anyone wanting to go to New York will do so by going to Mexico and crossing the border. Bus transportation is provided from there with free hotel rooms downtown provided. If you want to pay for a hotel room that is not possible since none are available. Vending machines offer free crack pipes, condoms, Narcon and other woke friendly items. There is no limitation on number – take all you want.

In San Francisco, malls are equipped with toilets that go floor to floor (commonly called elevators).  Pooping in elevator toilets can save time and the motion is exhilarating and flow is facilitated. Bring your own tent and enjoy the great outdoors. Essentials can be lifted for free if you can find any store still open.

The District of Columbia has many monuments and memorials to complement its highest crime rate (7,986 per 100,000 people). Florida has now been identified as a terrorist state. There are after all 14 states safer than Florida whose crime rate of 3,908 per 100,000 people. Also you can take your little boy to California or Minnesota and return with a little girl (with or without your consent)

Detroit, St Louis and Cleveland are cheap because nobody wants to go there. Roll the dice if you go to Detroit also known as Whitmer City which was a centerpiece of the governor’s reelection. Detroit has the first place for unsafe cities.

We at DogFacePonia have a tourist board to encourage vacationing here. It is a great, safe and welcoming place. Pony rides are complementary and even the dogs remember to use the restroom.

Image From: “IMG_3126” (CC BY 2.0) by cornstalker