Kamala Declares Victory Over the Border Crisis

Kamala laughing at podium

According to our sources, Kamala will not visit the border wall for at the least 64 days out of respect for “The Big Guy.” She did however find time to go to a Hobby Lobby for supplies to crochet Joe an afghan. She can then watch TV and be occupied. Still, she announced victory has been achieved though solace of mind, body, and media coverage. After all Trump is not president anymore. He is no longer separating families keeping children in cages (someone else is doing that).

We here in DogFacePonia are thinking it may be much longer than 64 days if ever. “Come on Man” every Democratic Administration of the last 50 years has claimed they would “fix immigration“. As you can see it is going well. We have learned previously that a 3-week shutdown to save everyone takes much much much much much longer, but will totally work unless (un)expected variants come up. Without these solid media cohorts we might have to worry about things equity or equality for citizens of our country. Freedom of the mind and spirit are not high with Kamala. We believe Kamala may visit the border before the 2024 election. We cannot be confident at this point as our perception of reality has been burnt to a crisp through the wildfire attacks on the capitol and global warming. Al Gore says we are already dead.

According to DogFacePony spies, Kamala would only like to peacefully place Joe Biden under a moving bus for humane reasons ala Andrew Cuomo. Kamala did say she would not shoot and kill Big Sniffer Joe by mistake in a federal building. We heard no further comments from our DogFacePonia Spy as it appears, he was unfortunately, in a horrible accident with a busing system. We later found out he may have had information on the Clinton Foundation.

Now we are going to circle back to the major point at hand. Kamala announced that by keeping a 6-state social distance program in place the border problem is going to solve itself. Through her representative in California, Kamala relayed that she is optimistic that this could be reduced to a 3-state social distance in the future. However Kamala is now happy to have taken residence in the Naval Uranus, were she has assured us she can stick it to us everyday for our own good. The location of Naval Uranus house is unknown, but Q-Bert, a reputable source has suggested it is most likely located in Wuhan, China. Unfortunately, Q-Bert has been unavailable for comment since the 1980s.

We here in DogFacePonia, find much of this information disorienting, but we are learning to accept the Biden Harris Regime just does things a bit different than past administrations. We are sure the media will get all the answers soon by not asking any questions.

Image From: “U.S. Sen. Kamala Harris speaks at L.A.’s” (Public Domain) by lukeharold