High on Biden

Joe Biden looking up while in a Restuarant.

Joe Biden addressed Congress at 9 eastern so as not to be head-to-head with Tucker Carlson which would lower ratings. Well as with any presidential speech, the Democrats got high in honor of Joe Biden. In normal times, people don’t have to announce when they have ingested drugs before stomaching a speech. (These are not normal times.)

The President got off to a good start by not tripping down the aisle. It was the high honor of Nancy Pelosi to introduce President Dementia. Sadly, George Floyd did not give the same solid introduction to the police. Clearly if he had the world might be a better place.

We here in DogFacePonia mourn people who have been wronged. We know it happens far to often. Now the list includes anyone who watched this speech.

The progress in our country has been clear for a long time.  A self-proclaimed black woman sat on one side behind “The Big Man” as a self-proclaimed vanilla ice-cream eater was on the other. An archive of the past was still the keynote speaker. Speaking of only his own wants this symbol of the United States of America kept both Vanilla and Chocolate ice cream silenced. We saw the muzzles on TV clearly. What may come from the other flavors, who knows?

Joey, aka “The Big Man,” preached how he has gained more jobs in his first 100 days in office than ever before. We here in DogFacePonia, admit this may be true. What is the breakdown, are women or men stuck at home schooling or coordinating children? Just then Jen Psaski circled in and gave us a solid circular explanation. We here in DogFacePonia were very surprised and unprepared for this kind of circular non-sense but not everyone is Kayleigh McEnany.

We did learn how much Joey cares about Mars, Vaccines and Lead Pipes. Joey was very upset about lead pipes. It seems homes, businesses, and even Capitol protests have led to less jobs. These lead pipes are a big problem. Maybe we need another crime bill just for lead pipes? Oh wait now JB says we should concentrate on the second amendment. Cause Guns are Bad M’Kay. Maybe Joe is confused. Maybe we all are. (We have no idea what he was talking about most of the time. Luckily Nancy didn’t rip up his speech. Maybe we can borrow her copy. We are pretty sure she can’t read anyway given the bills she pushed through.)

The big question is can anyone fit in anymore?

We here in DogFacePonia know we don’t fit in a J B world. However, we believe strongly in one comment he said, “No, President could remain silent.” Joe knows after all he remained silent for most of the first 100 days of his regime. We here in DogFacePonia however are never silent. We often wonder if the virus was voted in or voices voted out.

Another great question remaining is whether this boring speech will get higher ratings than the Academy Awards. Probably more than watched the the NBA Finals. Ted Cruz may have been the only one who fell asleep in the chamber but we have no idea how many people fell asleep watching.