In the last week, ICE seems active in places not normally anticipated. It seems that not even high ICE numbers can combat the invasion of illegal immigrants. Many of these Immigrants can be seen just hanging out in the front yards of the nation. Congress is considering increasing the number of cages at the border. However, these immigrants just keep falling out of the sky, or so it seems.
Ted Cruz (R), Texas, had to run to Cancun in fear for his life. He claims that the sky was falling, and he was afraid he might be almost murdered. We here in DogFacePonia are not sure where these crazy ideas might come from. Ted might be dilutional or just a great presidental candidate for 2028.
Democrats claim a wall cannot protect from this surge in illegal immigration. They may be correct this time around (as much as it pains us to admit). Clearly a wall would not protect us from this invasion. One Democrat said we should all have a bubble to protect us from this evil intrusion. We here in DogFacePonia are not sure a bubble would work but at least we have confidence that our government can still think up stuff to protect us.
Another Democrat said this invasion is super dangerous and guns are useless against it. Snowmen seem to be resistant to guns and climate change. We should take guns away from everyone and lock ourselves inside our homes for protection. We could try to turn on the heat to protect our selves from this menace but thanks to Green Energy it no longer works. Coca-Cola proposed that these snowmen should try to be less white.
The cause of this alien invasion is unknown. There were rumors lady liberty might be moving to Texas but so far all that moved from New York is the weather.
We here in DogFacePonia reached out to the White House press secretary, Jen Psaki, for comment. Jen Psaki said she can run circles around these Illegal Immigrants. Jen also said that illegal immigrants will melt away if we just ignore the problem. We know full well that Jen Psaki can run everyone in circles to solve issues. So we fully believe that not asking questions off script would have a negative effect.
With all her circling back some have proposed that Psaki could be a perpetual motion machine. If we could only harness this “Orange” energy. We might be able to power the entire state of Texas.