John Fetterman (woman he’s no longer sure) won the Pennsylvania Senate race on November 8, 2022. He has broken the glass ceiling as the first officially brain damaged candidate to win a national office. He is the idol of the ableists. He is also the first victim to be elevated to high office.
The verbal police are frantically trying to write a new document to change the language that is used to describe neurologically challenged individuals.
MSNBC has been the first to suggest that Fetterman should throw his hoodie in the ring for 2024. Fetterman already has a Fetterman Automated Teleprompter (FAT Plan) setup. That may have to change because of body shaming. He emulated Biden by avoiding public appearances and debates. The primaries would have no debates, preselected press questions, broadcasts from the basements and no medical records released.
Kamala Harris will definitely have trouble competing unless she can develop medically documented brain damage. Some believe she could claim to be cackle challenged creating yet another victim class.
Gavin Newsome clearly has no chance in 2024 because he doesn’t meet the criteria for a candidate. He is white, male, not a Martha’s Vineyard property owner and can’t break any glass ceilings or create any new victim class.
Stacey Abrams may run after two successful Gubernatorial campaigns in Georgia. Her future in the Democratic party is unlimited just like Hillary Clinton.
Joe Biden could run for re-election, but he better look over his shoulder Fetterman is coming, and he is bringing his shotgun. We here at DogFacePonia believe that no matter who wins The Primaries the Democrats will work hard to get them to face Mike Pence. Part of their playbook is to give massive financial support to the weakest possible opponent.
Image From: Governor Tom Wolf from Harrisburg, PA, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons