DogFacePonia has now experienced the violent culture of today. A group of violent protesters has taken over the UberFlush headquarters building and a surrounding 6 block area. The group known as Antiflush has used ropes and chains to tear down and destroy the huge porcelain throne in front of UberFlush headquarters. The throne was a treasured landmark and tourist attraction. All toilets in the headquarters building were removed and destroyed.
Mr. Flush, CEO of UberFlush Inc, was quoted as saying “the emergency response teams were not equipped to address this type of violence”. The DogFacePony soldiers were instructed to stand down.
The six block area was renamed the Capital Resistance Automous Park or C.R.A.P. C.R.A.P. has been recognized by China, North Korea and Iran so far. Their application for U.N. membership is being considered.
There is a rumor that J.B. Pritzker, the Governor of Illinois, is secretly supporting Antiflush. Pritzker gained notoriety for using toilet removal in his mansion for financial gain. The Feds began investigating Pritzker again when it became known that he purchased a large amount of toilet and bidet stock. Both are at record highs after Uberflush has been damaged. Bidet stocks were already soaring because of the Corona Tpocalypse and the fact that it is only one letter different then Biden.
Just like C.H.O.P., C.R.A.P. wants to come to a city near you. C.R.A.P. expects the excitement generated by the event to leave the Cities visited with a long lasting odor wafting through a large area far beyond the original C.R.A.P.. Crappers of the world unite say the Marxist group.
When asked for a comment by Fox News, Joe Biden began “Lyin Dog Face Ponysoldiers …”
We will continue to report on the future of Uberflush.
Origins of Uberflush:
Image From: “Inconveniences” (CC BY 2.0) by Elsie esq.
