Cow Gas and Fires are Trumps Fault

Wildfires continue across California, Oregon and Washington.  Firefighters have been unable to contain fires in Portland after 101 days. Seattle contained the fires for a time but they have broken out again. Fires are visible from space and can be seen moving rapidly. Los Angeles also has had many fires. Many people are leaving these areas and may not return. Rents in downtown Los Angeles, Portland and Seattle have plummeted. The smoke is being dyed to red to blame Republicans. Antifa lights daily fires in Portland. They then dance to “We didn’t start the fire” and blame it all on Trump.

The fires have been jumping to other metropolitan areas like Chicago, Rochester, Kenosha and New York.  Mitigating global warming and banning Billy Joel’s music has limited fires in other cities. First responders have been retiring from their jobs and moving to assist others in fighting the fires as they spread. The President is offering to help by sending in the National Guard.  Governors have refused help because the fires are Donald Trumps fault. The fires have yet to go into areas with farting cows if they do the fires may never end.

The Democrats blame these fires on global warming which has produced temperatures in excess of 120 degrees in Southern California (enough to ignite cow farts).  Governor Newsom complained that California has taken extreme measures to fight global warming including cutting fossil fuels. He has produced many great outcomes including rolling blackouts, indoor temperature mandates of 78 degrees and water shortages. But he has been unable to mitigate the fires.

Donald Trump is the current President so he is responsible for all these fires and for global warming because he does not support the New Green Deal. A protest is planning to bring farting cows to the White House in hopes of igniting fires there.

Image From: “burning cow” (CC BY 2.0) by qmnonic