After the shocking CRAP incident, UBERFlush has decided to move its headquarters to Portland. Mr. Flush said the decision was a simple one. He went on to say that Portland represents everything the company values. Mr. Flush decided that if a city can flush itself down the toilet so completely; they are just the kind of knowledgeable workers we need for new innovations. He went on to say how he expects land to be at bargain levels.
AOC told Portland lawmakers that they should not let UBERFlush move in. It might create Jobs and people really should not have to work. She went on to say how much the CRAP movement would be crippled if UBERFlush moves its headquarters. AOC has been a very big supporter of CRAP and would be sad if anything were to roll back the positive progress they have made.
Some at FOX are questioning this move wondering if it will work out. However, CNN said this is a great move, to a great city, that has had a daily party going on for a few months. MSNBC said it is a wonderful transition to a great place with high morale.
We have not heard if the CRAP celebrations plan to make the move to Portland as well. One member of the CRAP movement said there is so much CRAP in Portland already that the movement may lose steam in the streets of the Portland due to unending Love festival.
Heres hoping that CRAP decides to travel with UBERFlush to the wonderful community of Portland.
Origins of C.R.A.P.: