Dueling Impeachments

Medieval Duel

People are calling for Impeachments after the disastrous withdrawal for Afghanistan, the illegal covid mandates and January 6th events. This and the terrible inflation and overall falling of America by world standards. The DOJ investigating everyone supporting Brandon. Someone must be impeached, but who?

DogFacePonia recommends we let them have a duel to determine who gets impeached! Each will be assigned an appropriate weapon.

Joe Biden

This is the obvious choice of course. Donald Trump was impeached for Quid-Pro-Quo with Ukraine. So Biden can be for the same with the president of Afghanistan right? What about the mountain of evidence on Hunter Biden’s laptop. What about Hunter’s Art Shows? 10% for the Big Guy!! Although we thought about assigning Joe’s own incompetence as a weapon. It certainly has proven to be a destructive force. Instead, we have assigned him a lame duck as we all know he is not making it to another term.

Nancy Pelosi

Many are demanding an Impeachment, but nothing comes to a vote without Nancy’s approval. It’s been months since an impeachment. Let’s get the show going to distract from the terrible news we get all the time. If she won’t bring Impeachment of anyone to a vote. Let’s Impeach her! For the duel Nancy is drunk on power (and other things). She will be assigned a wine glass.

Kamala Harris

For the most part, we look to impeach people for what they have done. In Kamala’s case, we will impeach her for what she has not done. Which is anything at all. She did nothing about the border. She has done nothing to help a demented President. She has done nothing for the American People. The one thing she does know about is toilet paper. This shall be her weapon in the duels!

Mitch McConnell

Mitchy says there will be no impeachment of Biden. First off, the impeachment is done in the house not the Senate so Mitchy Poo has no say in it. Mitch isn’t even the President of the Senate, Kamala is. Since nobody knows where she is, I guess Mitch thinks he is the leader. But maybe America needs an event that will bring bi-partisan unity. Let’s impeach Mitch! We must do this before he pretends he will not raise the debt ceiling again. Mitch could destroy the whole nation by spending alone. So we have assigned him the appropriate weapon of a credit card.

Donald Trump

We discussed this at length before. Trump said mean things on Twitter! It has been quite a while since he said these mean things, or literally was on twitter as they banned him. No matter, his words apparently made Adam Kinsinger sad enough to cry. So the Democrats want him out he must go but wait he isn’t president anymore. But that doesn’t matter to them. After all, the Covid Mandates are Trump’s fault too. If he had never done Warp Speed we wouldn’t have a vaccine and there could be no mandate! Liberal Logic is impeccable!! Trump can be 3 time impeachment champion. We thought of giving Trump a broadsword, nuclear weapons or an AR-15. Instead, we assigned Trump the most dangerous weapon of all a Twitter account.

Let the Battle Royal Begin!!! What could go wrong??? Nothing at all!!

Image From: “Duel” (CC BY 2.0) by arthwollipot