Mayorkas Blames Anyone But Himself

Mayorkas laughing

Alejandro Mayorkas might be the worst Secretary of modern times. Surely, Pete Buttigieg is giving him a run for his money. He is doing things like hiring people with mental illness to work for the FAA. But no worries only a few planes have had doors fly off and a couple of major trains have collided. Buttigieg is doing a bang-up job as they say. You would think this would be hard to top but Mayorkas is up for the challenge.

DHS missions are border security, Anti-Terrorism, cyber security, and disaster prevention and management. DHS’s single largest and most important job is to protect the US border. If that is not done its missions of border security and anti-terrorism are basically total failures. He will probably tell you he has been on top of terrorism by arresting MAGA Extremists who Illegally parade. Most of us probably think otherwise and even with that the FBI has made most arrests in Jan 6th cases. As for disaster prevention well most of the worst disasters that could be prevented are related to fentanyl and illegal immigration so pretty much failing there too.

Still, with all of this, Mayorkas will let you know that it is not his or the Biden Administration’s fault. We came up with a list of who he is blaming for the crisis they caused.

Who or what will Mayorkas blame instead?

  • Hunter Biden – Hunter needs illegal supplies of Cocaine and Baby Formula
  • Inflation – If not for crushing inflation, the immigrants wouldn’t want to come here where we have inflation.
  • Covid – Because Covid has been the answer to everything that is wrong – right?
  • Governor Greg Abbott – How dare Abbott try to do his job for him! Unbelievable.
  • The Supreme Court – The plan was to blame the Supreme Court for allowing Abbott to guard the border with razor wire. But then the Supreme Court had to go and you know side with the administration. Now the plan is to blame the Supreme Court for allowing him to take down the wire. It is a win/win as he can still blame the SCOTUS.
  • Cicadas – This year is set to be the largest brood of cicadas since the Louisiana Purchase. It also is rumored they believe Trump won, so they should be blamed.
  • Climate Change – Umm so because climate change made it too hot in Haiti or Venezuela or whatever they needed to come here and freeze in the polar vortex. They should have bought Electric cars.
  • His Hair – Despite his Hispanic name, Mayorkas looks pretty white and he is male (for now). Sure he could claim he received abuse growing up for being “brown” but we doubt anyone would believe him. Make no mistake, he is in a hidden protected class. He has no hair. How can he be expected to live up to the expectation of doing his job without hair? How dare you judge him.
  • Whips – Remember when the mean border patrol was whipping people. Yeah so blame whips. Sure they never had whips and those were the horse’s reins, but whatever.
  • Hugo Chavez / Fidel Castro – The leftists destroyed their countries, so people left their countries to come here. So why not blame 2 dead guys?
  • George W Bush – George W Bush created the DHS after 9/11. Without it being created there would be no DHS. If not for that, then Mayorkas could not be a total failure running it. I guess we can blame George Washington too while we are at it. If not for George Washington we would not have a country or borders.
  • The Taliban – Similar to the above statements on Bush.
  • Kamala – Everything was totally fine at the border until Kamala went there so it must be her fault.
  • Rotten Bananas – to be honest he would blame bananas before he would take responsibility. We reached out to Gwen Stefani for comment so far nothing.
  • Trump – This of course is the most obvious answer. It is Trump’s fault! The question as to why he didn’t have the same number of issues is unexplainable.

However you look at it, we all know Mayorkas won’t do the right thing. He won’t resign even after failure in basically every aspect of his job. We also know Biden won’t fire him because he doesn’t know where he is.

Image From: U.S. Department of Homeland Security (DHS), Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons